When most people think cipher, they either go with a password ciper or what's called Caesar code, which is traditionally replacing alphabetic values with letters that are three steps away.
Starting with that, it was easy to figure out that you have a five letter cipher going. (You wouldn't have done this if you didn't want me to figure it out, and I was never going to guess a password, right?) So if A=F...
Here's your message:
You are a fat chode.
Short Answer: I'm actually most impressed by the use of the word chode. I think the full eclipse of chode by the word 'taint' is a little disappointing. I also like that you chose chode because as I was translating, I would've guessed a lot of other insults coming down the pipeline, like piece of shit or motherfucker. This one held me in suspense until somewhere between the H and the O.
Note: Remember that chode is short for choda? Choda! Don't hear that anymore.