Sunday, May 28, 2017

Question: Tell me a joke, Keithy?

Jesus. You send one group email wherein you refer to yourself as Keithy...

Here's a joke I just made-up the other night: Your mama's so fat, she goes to great widths to avoid things.

Now I have to do that thing where I make up a new joke on the spot. Here goes: Your mama's so ugly, she has to wear a Clint Howard mask in public.

That's not bad. Let's go once more: Your mama's so stupid, she thought Bill Nye was an actual science guy.

Oh. That's just mean! Now I feel a bit bad. I've been listening to a lot of smart people talk big ideas, recently, and it was revealed to me that Bill Nye's credentials are quite meager compared to many other science activists and advocates. I don't know the guy, and my instinct is that despite his education, it's good that he's out there promoting science. Maybe he shouldn't be the poster boy for debate and scientific discussion, but...what do I know? Listening to experts teaches you one thing; you ain't no expert.

Fooled you! Ask Keith Anything knows all! The facade wasn't dropped in the slightest! That wasn't a peek into Keithy's real life. How dare you think I wasn't playing a prank on you! You turds!

Short Answer: Your answer was so short, the person who asked the question was all like, "Is it in, yet?" Burn on Keithy!

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