Friday, March 10, 2017

Question: You are not God's gift to spelling?

Hmmm. Not sure what to make of this. If it was a statement, I suppose I could refute. There's a spellcheck on every single thing we do, these days, so to spell something incorrectly, you have to misspell the word into another, real word. So I don't think there are many spelling errors on this blog. Especially not per word.


Also, if you are trying to criticize me, fuck you. Where's your blog? How fast do you produce mind-blowing, laugh-out-loud, make-your-mother-less-proud-of-you content?


Because sometimes, along with speed comes errors and an overall lack of satisfaction. Or so I've been told.


Now, if this was a question, and not just an insult with a question mark stapled to its rear-end, I guess my answer has to be more complicated.


If you thought I was, and now you're disillusioned because you caught a spelling error on blog, I'm sorry to disappoint you. I am not God's gift to spelling. I make mistakes, just like everyone else, including God himself. Like the mistake of making you, if in fact you wrote this so-called question just to insult me and be a dick. Or if you prefer a kinder god, the mistake of giving you reasonably-sized genitals when you have the heart of a person with much less impressive genitals.


That's right. You have small-dick-heart. Or, I suppose, gaping-pussy-heart.


Short Answer: I do tend to underuse/overuse hyphens, which are technically spelling errors. If you want to get technical, that is. And if you do, go away.


Note: Reading over this, I caught a your/you're that was wrong. Shit.

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