Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Question: Why do you love me?

Top Ten Reasons I Love My Wife:

10-1) Boobs.

No, no, we can really do this.

Top Ten Reasons I Love My Wife:

10) You're shaped like a thing that I want to touch with my penis.
9) You're generous to the point of frustration.
8) You're the funniest person I've ever met other than myself.
7) You don't smell bad, no matter how hard you try.
6) You let me be myself.
5) Even when you're a total dick it's kind of adorable.
4) My life is incredible because of you.
3) I get joy from watching you love the things you love.
2) My dream of becoming a professional success is alive because you believe in me.
1) Due to  your continued existence and presence in my vicinity, my personal success is immense, and allows me to face life's many challenges.

Short Answer: Just kidding. It's boobs.

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