1. How to spell 'lots of'.
2. I don't like talking about bratty idiots, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't, because they might become leader of the free world.
3. I had a good run.
4. Radio is a thing.
5. Lots of people want to read my work. Few want to pay for it.
6. If you write three short books instead of three long books, you still wrote three books.
7. If you call a line you wrote on a toilet stall a book, who's going to know?
8. The world is great, despite what the news says.
9. A woodpecker's wings sound different in flight than a raven's.
10. Trying new things is important. Failure is supposed to be as well, but I'll get back to you.
11. Long walks and stimulants are the key to creative success.
12. 1984 is still the greatest book ever written.
13. I'm not a psychopath. Not that I would've cared.
14. People die. Even famous ones.
15. Real, important, truthful journalism is dying and we need to get on that stat.
16. Television can consistently be better than movies.
17. To block anyone on social media who even comes close to an offhand spoiler, because it saves you pain in the long run.
18. My wife is different than I thought and it's okay.
19. I've got an angry tummy.
20. I can't solve anything by being stressed out all the time, or by trying to multitask while I'm multitasking.
21. I should stop trying to solve everything.
22. I need to re-learn how to learn to learn better.
23. I prefer sex from behind.
24. Years aren't good or bad; moments are. (And moments pass far more quickly, though I suppose I knew that already.)
25. No matter how hard I try to be straightforward and honest, no matter how hard I try to be myself and make other people happy, I am a confusing, difficult person who is still capable of making people unhappy.
26. By liking something on social media, you're feeding your own addiction as well as someone else's. (Still don't know if this is good, bad or really bad.)
27. Podcasts are a thing.
28. Reading classic literature doesn't necessarily give you insight. It also doesn't promise to make you a better person, writer or reader. Sometimes, it's just something that was good before good got better.
29. I am getting older.
30. I must struggle to be wiser.
Things I Already Knew That Were Reinforced in 2016
1. I like David Bowie.
2. I love myself.
3. I'm good enough, but I must find a way to get better.
4. I am a plunderer of knowledge, not a natural student.
5. Someone weird could become president if we let too much money into the game.
6. People are almost willing to take a chance on me.
7. Ambition is not happiness, no matter how it attempts to skew your perspective.
8. I'm not the smartest. I'm not the funniest. I don't have the biggest penis.
9. I have a wonderful partner. She is generous and has swell boobs.
10. Tampons don't go in the butt. (Stupid Keith! Stupid!)