Friday, December 30, 2016

Question: I bet you can't insult me.

You're a gangly nimrod.


What happened here, is that I win. Here's why. I just insulted you. Whether or not you feel insulted is irrelevant. Here's another insult: the way you asked the question inflicts a defeat upon you before we've even begun.


Nice shoes, gravy boat.


There's another one. Did it makes sense? Do you feel hurt? Are you crying? Doesn't matter. The act of the insult is all.


I guess you would have had to say, "You can't make me feel insulted." Then, there would be no debate.


Here's another one. Even had you written your 'question' the way I just suggested, you'd still lose, because this is not a back and forth situation. You're handing me the reins, and I can call your horse a stupid asshole all I want, and you can't do anything about it.


Your horse is a stupid asshole. Your face is the kind of face that makes dry heaving feel like the better option.


Also, you have a small penis/large vagina.


Short Answer: All in all, you may be right. But here's a universal insult just in case you think I couldn't pull this off face to face. Your insecurities are obvious and they make you unlikeable. Happy New Year!

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