Sunday, June 12, 2016

Question: How do you feel about all this snow?

Uhhhh...


I'm going to assume that you know that I don't live where you do. Let me explain.


People live in lots of different places. Some of those places don't have snow in fucking June. I live in one of the places with no fucking snow.


Sometimes I rely on swearing for emphasis, and I like it. I like the fuck out of it.


Anyfuck, shut up about your stupid snow. It's warm as balls here. I wish I had some damn snow. I'd rub it on my hot, sweaty nutsack and moan with pleasure like Roseanne at the buffet.


Short Answer: Is Roseanne too dated a reference for millennials? If so, who's the millennial Roseanne Barr? Everyone who gets famous these days loses weight as soon as they can afford a personal trainer, which makes it hard to find a true fatty. Be proud, fatties! It takes all kinds, not just weird, pseudo-thin freaks. Is Jonah Hill the new Roseanne? He looked super weird when he lost that weight. Not at first, but on the way back up. Somewhere in between seems to be the way to go. I think he's all right now. Seth Rogen too. Seth Rogen skinny was strange. Is he Roseanne Barr? Have I really dedicated this entire short answer to Roseanne Barr? I'm fucking tired.

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