How is your mom feeling after all the butt stuffs?
Yea, I don't need to ask many questions. I was awarded this blog by the high council of knowing all the things. If I needed answers, I probably wouldn't be running an advice column where I accurately answer questions and solve people's problems with textured insight and amazing clarity.
Here's a question. How funny is your blog?
Here's the answer. As funny as it is when I give your mom a hot sack-lunch.
Short Answer: I'll admit, that on occasion, I phone an answer in by insulting your mother. But I swear, bro, she likes that shit.
Note: I don't usually do this, but I was looking through my posts and saw something that made me want to return to yesterday's answer. In my feed, the question 'Gargantuan lilies are beyond the window' read as 'Gargantuan lilies are beyond the wind...' And I saw the poetry in it! You see, if a delicate, beautiful thing is big, and therefore can hold up against the rushing wind - be beyond the damage it could cause - then there's contrast and poetry! It says something about pretty things and how we judge books by their covers and how even the most delicate of us can be 'beyond the wind'. It's also kinda proverby in the sense that it implies a zen-like truth, that what you imagine would damage something, or what could be damaged, can be changed by perspective.