Sir, could you please step out of the vehicle. Do you know how retarded you were going? Just because it's a school zone doesn't mean it's a 'short-bus' school zone. Sir. Sir? Could you put your penis back in your pants. That would be excellent.
I'm surprised this has never happened before. Most 'qeustons' I get are almost completely coherent. Sure, sometimes people try to be funny when they ask the question, and that can be a little tedious, but I've never been drunk dialed before. Let's try and answer as best we can.
Super hammered dudes are idiots. They're going to be drawn to the simplicity of large breasts, which is totally appropriate. It matches their intentions perfectly. They want to see them, touch them, suck on them, blow their business on them and then throw up.
Mystery solved. Now try to get some rest.
Short Answer: I gotta be fair. I go for the huge boobs even when I'm not drunk.